10 mins read ⏳
So physics jokes are probably the science jokes that test how smart you are the most!
For you to understand a physics joke, you have to at least know the basic functionalities of the world.
Here are the top funniest physics jokes that I gathered:
1. What do you call a scientist who loves to study gas laws by drinking soda?
Fizz-icist.
2. The rocket scientist became a skilled archer. Really? He was just testing arrow dynamics.
3. A physicist is watching a man who believes he can fly.
Every time he goes up the steep hill, he jumps off and hurts himself.
The physicist watches this for 7 days.
On the 8th day he goes to the man and says, “I don’t think you understand the gravity of the situation”.
4. What’s a physicist’s favorite snack?
Fig Newtons.
5. The two physics teachers aren’t speaking.
Guess there’s a lot of friction between them.
6. I find anti-gravity jokes to be incredibly uplifting.
7. A witch and a physicist can make potions with motions, lol.
8. The facts about electricity might shock you.
9. Wind got in trouble for resisting arrest.
10. Circuit engineers like to keep their news current.
11. I would tell a parachute joke but you wouldn’t catch my drift.
12. What do you call someone who steals energy from the museum? A Joule thief!
13. Malfunctioning machines really grind an engineer’s gears.
14. The watch felt really stupid.
Its cognitive processes were down.
15. Too bad the lazy office worker got fired for sitting all day. He had so much potential energy.
16. A subatomic duck gives zero quarks about your opinion.
17. The tiniest fairy that can fix cars is called a quantum mechanic.
18. The frequency of physics homework hertz.
19. During spring break, physics students love going surfing to catch the waves.
20. What's the most terrifying word in nuclear physics?
"Oops!"
21. Have you heard of the physicist who got chilled to absolute zero.
He’s oK now.
22. Why is it best to teach physics on the edge of a cliff?
Because that’s where students have the most potential.
23. I was studying frequency in my physics class, now my brain Hertz.
24. Why was Heisenberg’s wife unhappy?
Because whenever he had the energy, he didn’t have the time.
25. What did the Nuclear Physicist have for lunch?
Fission Chips(made in Nova oven).
26.Why does a burger have less energy than a steak?
Because it’s in its ground state.
27. Einstein developed a theory about space.
And it was about time too.
28. Why is electricity an ideal citizen?
Because it conducts itself so well.
29. Did you hear about the physicist who was reading a great book on anti-gravity?
He couldn't put it down.
30. Where does bad light end up?
In prism.
31. Physics is the science where it takes long, complicated equations to explain why round balls roll.
32. How many general-relativity theoretists does it take to change a light bulb?
Two. One to hold the bulb and one to rotate space.
33.Old physicists don’t die, their wavefunctions go to zero as time goes to infinity.
34. How many astronomers does it take to change a light bulb?
None, astronomers prefer the dark.
35. What happens when electrons lose their energy?
They get Bohr’ed.
36. I have a new theory on inertia but it doesn’t seem to be gaining momentum.
37. Why can’t you trust an atom?
They make up everything.
38. What did the male magnet say to the female magnet?
"From your backside, I thought you were repulsive. However, after seeing you from the front, I find you rather attractive."
39. What did one photon say to the other photon?
"I’m sick and tired of your interference".
40. A Higgs Boson walks into church.
The priest says, “You can’t come in here, we don’t allow Higgs Bosons".
The Higgs Boson says, “But without me, how can you have mass"?
41. Who was the first electricity detective?
Sherlock Ohms.
42. What’s the difference between an auto mechanic and a quantum mechanic?
The quantum mechanic can get the car inside the garage without opening the door.
43. What do physicists enjoy doing the most at sporting events?
The Wave.
44. What do you get when you cross a chicken with a turkey?
|chicken|×|turkey|sinθ.
45. A physicist's favorite bumper sticker: "Absolute zero is really cool!"
46. What is the difference between a quantum theorist and a beauty
therapist?
The quantum theorist uses Planck’s Constant as a foundation, whereas the beauty therapist uses Max Factor.
47. Which books are the hardest to force yourself to read through?
Friction books.
48. You enter the high school lab and see an experiment. How will you know which class is it?
If it’s green and wiggles, it’s biology.
If it stinks, it’s chemistry.
If it doesn’t work, it’s physics.
49. A photon checks into a hotel. The front desk asks “Do you need help with your luggage?”
The photon replies, “I don’t have any. I’m a travelling light.”
50. Why should you go drinking with neutrons?
Wherever they go, there’s no charge.
BORED???
51.Aristotle: It is the nature of chickens to cross roads.
Issac Newton: Chickens at rest tend to stay at rest, chickens in motion tend to cross roads.
Albert Einstein: Whether the chicken crossed the road or the road moved beneath the chicken depends on your frame of reference.
Werner Heisenberg: We are not sure which side of the road the chicken was on, but it was moving very fast.
Wolfgang Pauli: There already was a chicken on this side of the road.
52. Two fermions walk into a bar. One says "I'll have a scotch on the rocks." The other says "Darn, that's what I wanted."
53. What did the duck say to the physicist?
Quark, quark, quark!
54. Two kittens are on a roof. Which one falls off first?
The one with the lowest mew.
55.Sometimes physics can be a real bummer.
I was thinking about gravity yesterday and it really brought me down.
56. A ramp is inclined to agree on most matters.
Have a lovely day!
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